Okay, I have just finished paying all my bills...which has left me with a little over 200 dollars (and most of the time it's not that much) until the 3rd of next month. To get our things we need such as food,shampoo, soap etc. *SIGH*

And as I have been sitting here looking at the computer screen, I have been asking myself, what things do we need and what things can we live without..

We already have no cable as we can't afford that..we have quit using our heat as much to cut down on the electric bill... and I am asking myself do I really need the internet? Do I need the phone? No, I don't need the internet. Yes I do need the phone. So I am considering cutting my internet and getting the lowest phone package possible.

I know this decision will cut me off from a lot of my friends and that totally sucks. But at the moment, I am considering the welfare of my family and our needs. Which I have not done in a very long time. What could be the benefit of this, you may be asking? Well, the main one is that I won't be sitting on my ass not doing anything. Which I have done a lot of lately and I might actually lose weight! I haven't completely resigned myself to cutting the net yet, will weigh all my pros and cons before making any decisions..I am just getting things down that are in my head now, as I tend to forget things pretty easily as of late.

I have two credit cards that I am paying on and three loans...outrageous!But was so easy to get into. I am cutting the cards up and throwing them away, so that I can't use them. Will get them paid off and gone.

I am going to be planting some veggies instead of flowers this year to ease our grocery cost a little..Will only be a very small garden in the flower beds that I already have as I live in an apt complex and can't have an actual garden.

Why do I feel like I need to simplify things? Well, one I want to get back to basics with my family, especially my children. We do not spend as much time together as a family as we use to and I am starting to miss that.

Then there is the fact that each month when we get paid and it's time to pay the bills, I get beyond stressed...Just thinking about all the money we have to pay out and how little we have left after doing so almost makes me physically sick.

And when the kids want something, most of the time I have to tell them we just don't have the money. Then I feel guilty and think to myself,"what can I give up so they can have?"

So I guess after all this thinking we will be having a family discussion to see where we want things to go, then I will decide from there.

So, if you are reading this friend or not. If you have a piece of friendly advice, it would be nice to hear it.

TTFN,

Bonnie